no more empty heart

in the morning when i wake up, i want to think of how empty my heart is, but God always whisper to me, "you don't need to worry, for here I am, filling the emptiness in your heart.

Once there was a man, whom i thought loved me dearly, whom i thought held me tight that he won't let go no matter what. But i forgot, that he was just a man with changing heart and mind. After 5 years of believing him, i came to a point where in my heart went weary. I became o tired to believe him and it made me so  w,eak. In my weakness, i was able to see my strength. I became very very strong.

It was my greatest fear to see him letting go of my hand. It was my greatest fear be left behind and see him moving forward.  It was my greatest fear to be far away from his heart. And so my greatest fear suddenly appeared. I could not imagine and could not find a way how to face it. But when it came, God did not leave me. He was with me and he made me very courageous to face it all alone.

 You will know how brave you are when you are able to face and overcome your greatest fear. You will know how much your worth is when you are able to let go of something/ someone that you've never imagined you can live without.

Now i am strong enough, brave enough and valuable enough. ^^

Deokman met Bidam

Bidam was Mishil's son. But Mishil abandined him after King Jinji refused to recognize Mishil as his queen. On that day, King Jinji was dethroned as King. Mishil revealed that the latesking's successor was his nephew (Deokman's father).

Bidam grew up in the mountains. He did not have any idea about his parents until he met Deokman and Mishil. He saw a lot of himself in Mishil. He then found out that he was Mishil's son. Mishil, did not recognize him as her own even before she died.

On the other hand, Bidam has fallen in love to Deokman. When they first met, he was not so gentle to Deokman. He even once tried to trade Deokman to sacks of herbs. But Deokman did not show him any cruelty even after she found out that she was the Silla Princess. 

Bidam was so true to his feelings for Deokman. He did not have any doubt about it until he was screwed up by his own followers. They swayed Bidam. They made him believe that the Deokman lied to him. They made Bidam believe that Deokman  trully wanted him to die for he was Mishil's son. 

Bidam then planned to revenge. 

Eventually, he found out that he was just used by his followers. He was so resentful. But was already on the bridge of no turning back. He has already been declared as public enemy and must face death. 

Bidam died in the hands of Yushin, ten steps a way from Deokman. Before he died he granted the Queen's wish. That is to call her by her name "Deokman"

Deokman had nowhere to go

Deokma's spent several years in the Palace as an army. Nobody knew she was a woman. While she was in the palace, she has been patching things right. She woke up one day and found out that she was a royal blood.

Should she be pleased that she finally know that real her? No, she wasn't. She even had resentments. She had nowhere to go. She couldn't stay in the palace because the King will kill her. She was escorted by her captain (Yushin), to escape. Yushin has become close to Deokman. Without Deokman's knowledge, Yushin knew from the very beginning that she was a woman.  Yushin was very willing to spend his life with Deokman.

Princess Cheomyong came to help Deokman and Yushin escaped from Silla. When Deokman had already decieded to escape and live a peaceful life far fron Silla and Mishil, Cheomyong died. An arrow struck her. Deokman, was aware it should have been her.

She the decided to face her fate in Silla.

Yushin and Deokman

Deokman and her twin sister Cheomyong

When Deokman was on her way to find Munno? She accidentally met her twin sister, Cheomyong. Cheomyong grew up in the palace. She was given all the attention she needed as a princess. But, in the palace, she somewhat lived in misery.

Lady Mishil who is a very powerful as a king and very influential woman in the Kingdom of Shila, all people feared her, so as Cheomyong. the princess' life was doomed by her menace. Mishil always told the princess that Cheomyong has caused the Kingdom's ill-fated base.

The princess decided to live far away from a princess' life. She gave birth to a beautiful boy and after giving birth, she was so determined to find Munno.

The princess was on a ship, when Deokman asked to hitch. Suddenly, a group of men attacked the ship. Deokman saved the princess. They have come to know that they  were looking for the same person.

They became very close as brother and sister that when Cheomyong was brought back to the palace, she let Deokman stay in the kingdom and train as a hwarang ( army).

Deokman as a Hwarang

Princes Cheomyong

The Urge of Deokman

Intro:


Have you fallen in love to a person you know but doens't know you at all? Have you fallen in love to a person who had lived long time ago and of course you know wouldn't come back? Have you fallen in love to a character? To a person whom you know never existed and will never exist? Well, me? Yes, I have.
 
 
In the desert, Deokman met a man who introdused himself as a merchant His name was Chilsuk. Chilsuk was Mishil's personal bodyguard. He was given an order ti fins Deokman and should not return to the palace without Deokman with him.
 
Sohwa came to realize that he was from the palace. Deokman and Sohwa struggled in the desert. They encounterd a sand storm that caused Deokman and her known mother to separate. Deokman tried to save her mom, but she failed. After that insident in the desert, Deokman find her own way. She then decided to findout who her father was. She wanted to know why he left them in the desert. Sohwas never told her the truth. She has heard about Munno many times. She thought her father was Munno.
 

(Munno - the Geukson in Queen Seon Deok)

(Sohwa and Chilsuk)

clik the link below to more about 

QSD dramawiki

 

The young Deokman

Intro:
Have you fallen in love to a person you know but doens't know you at all? Have you fallen in love to a person who had lived long time ago and of course you know wouldn't come back? Have you fallen in love to a character? To a  person whom you know never existed and will never exist? Well, me? Yes, I have.


Deokman was born as a princess, but she was never given a chance by her father (King JinPyeong), to live as a princess. She was given to Sohwa. Sohwa was given an order to take the baby away from the palace.She  had a twin sister (Cheomyeong). That's the reason why the King chose to let the palace maid take care of Deokman as her own daughter.


In a far away desert, Sohwa and Deokman lived a simple but happy life. Deokman grew up strong like a man. Some people did not know she was a girl. She was a very smart kid. She knew many things about astrology and commercialism. She grew up full of knowledge and wisdom.

(Nam Ji Hyun- young Deokman)

click the link to know more about Nam Ji Hyun

Boryang mode

Hmmmm....zzzzzzzz!!!

When I was on my way here (E-lamp office) this today, I was trying to think what to do. I knew today isn't going to be an ordinary day. In the past one and a half years, I did not think of this. I mean, of what to do when I get to the office. It has been my routine to, turn on the PC, log my sched on my note, be mindful of the time and teach. But, today is totally a new day, not only for me, but to some of us here. They have removed all my students from my schedule. I don't have any work to do here. Nobody to teach, no reports to finish. So what then? Surf the Internet? Play offline/online games? Watched videos? oh..I'm bummed!

I had to keep myself busy.
So I opened a job site .
I did not want to waste time sitting pretty. I sent an application to 8 call center companies. For now, I can't tell where I'll end up with. But with God's guidance, i hope to be hired as soon as posible in a better company.